I used to struggle with self-esteem issues as a teenager; I just wasn’t fitting into the definition of “a beautiful girl” I knew in my environs. My own was just too obvious 😒😏😂
I had weight issues and wasn’t really a foodie person as a result my weight issues worsened for me as the years went by. I was much slimmer and without the defining shape that puberty brought on. I think my skirts and uniforms were always straight without any curves to hold on to the sides as compare to other girls🙈🙈.
To some extend I felt my weight was a major topic in many conversations, even the ones without me. But it wasn’t just my weight that I had a problem with. I even had a problem figuring out where my pubic hair, cycle etc where coming from and to come to terms with the fact that this was my new reality; please don’t get me wrong. Yes, my science teacher; a male, has taught us puberty and all the related topics and we were even made to memorize the theory, however, having to experience it was a whole different level for me. I was confused, lost and shy; I couldn’t come to terms with my new reality 😃.
Ha!! I started to avoid some of my mates and their hips and pimples conversation, I had a problem, as far as I was concerned. I couldn’t really admire myself in the mirror beside there was nothing really to check out. I was so worried trying to find answers to this teenage puberty situation that I completely forgot to live the moments.
One day, prompted by the voice (in my head), I decided to look at myself through the mirror. I looked at my eyes and all I saw was a confuse, lost girl and this was so glaring unconsciously.
I heard ‘’ Naa Make peace with yourself.” “Make peace with yourself, Aku Shika.” “Make peace with yourself, Madam 😊.” I smiled but I didn’t even understand the whole process. The voice kept nudging me to continue staring. And honestly, that’s was the breakthrough.
Now, when I catch a reflection of myself, I either do a dance or I smile or make godly declaration upon myself or engage in self-talk, even if it’s a broken mirror!
I have learnt to embrace and live in the moment while making deliberate decisions that bring progression to my life. I also found out that the more I smiled at myself, the more I found reasons to smile, be happy, be among people while embracing my individualism and uniqueness. It wasn’t a short process but I’ve come to love me! I’m so in love with me because I try every day to see myself the way God sees me.
I’m not smiling because I’m in competition with anyone. I smile because I’m at peace with myself, with who He made me, with how He crafted me!
So, the next time you find yourself in a conflicting situation, get a mirror and stand in front of it, look into your own eyes and smile, live the moment regardless of the situation and learn to embrace yourself!